The world ebbs and flows
as time trickles
like sand between my toes.
Moments crushed underfoot.
Forgotten.
Wish you were here
to share this now
breathe the wind
and feel the noise
hide this moment
in your smile
let it shine
in your eyes -
Hush.
Let the wind whip away
the unsaid words.
Breathe. Live. Be.
Becoming can wait,
and so can tomorrow.
The fisherfolk are heading out to sea;
today, they cast their nets
for happiness.
2 responses so far ↓
abhimanyu // 17 May, 2009 at 8:48 pm |
tighter,better rhythm. ending sounds abrupt but is more powerful somehow,now in its openness…altho,personally,like the first version better…
Chittz: Good to know that the changes helped. As a friend of mine put it, the last stanza was mush.
ankushthakur // 25 May, 2009 at 9:00 pm |
Very nice; lot better.
Chittz: Thank you.